Zombie

This post is also written later than the published date. The date is accurate for the times events, but my mind was simple elsewhere. 




Gary, Tiffany, baby and I are staying with Jim, my step-dad. The house I grew up in. It is empty and without my mom there, it just feels eerily wrong. Dad isn't taking things well, as to be expected. Neither am I. Neither is anyone. Packed on with no sleep, coupled with an emotional train wreck, I was simply a zombie. 


The house, already decided, was going to be put up on the market as soon as possible. Dad didn't want to be there any longer than he had to be, but who would want to be. The house needed a huge overhaul clean. Dust and grime, dirt and who knows what was everywhere. The house wasn't maintained well and we spent all day cleaning and throwing things out, at the end of the day it didn't look like we did a thing. I scrubbed out the bathroom tub and I still couldn't bare to bathe Ariyana in it. 


I made dinner tonight for everyone, which was a very weird feeling as my mom was always the cook. Or was when I was living there ten years ago. 


After dinner, I sorted things up in my childhood bedroom. Random items that had been long left and forgotten of many years ago. Pictures, keepsakes, things of that sort. Christmas ornaments, decades old photo equipment, and boxes of who-knows-what were brought down from the attic to find a new home. 


I was on the verge of an emotional breakdown. I just wanted to wake up from this nightmare.